Good news Mark II

So, it was about 1pm at work when my mobile rang, and as soon as I saw the number I could tell it was a phone call from Berri, but nice and calm, I answered the phone. The polite "Hi, how are you?"s followed, and I tried to sound as relaxed as possible, knowing this call could have been the "we appreciate you coming in but unfortunately...." type of call I've gotten so many times before. And then he said the magic words - "We'd like to offer you a job". I was already sitting down but I still felt like I was gonna fall, my heart was pounding and a massive smile spread across my face. I forgot about trying to be all calm on the phone and let the guy know how happy I was. So, after 9 long years, I can finally hand in my notice at Bilo. I haven't yet done that, but I'll have done it by Friday, and I can't wait to do it.

So, this job is in Berri, around 3 hours away, so I'll have to move a lot of my stuff there and live between two places. My week-long rental at Berri, and my weekend place here in Adelaide. On the way home, after being all excited initially, I guess the shock started sinking in and I got really sad and emotional. All of a sudden, I just got so scared of what might happen, being all alone, etc etc. Bloody women and their emotions. Since then I have realised that, in terms of other positions I've interviewed for that were located in Canberra, Berri is probably ideal. Some time on my own might be just what I need to branch out and extend beyond my safe little bubble. Going to a place where I know no one will enable me to come out of my shell, to make new friends, to reflect on the things I already have and am grateful for, and perhaps appreciate life a bit more. All of the reasons I was so eager to find a job outside of Adelaide. And it's a double bonus, because it's inevitable that I will get homesick occasionally, and so being a simple drive away from home will make me feel better. I mean, I've gone camping on weekends further than what Berri is, so it'll be a breeze. And the time I spend with loved ones will probably be more quality time, because I'll cherish seeing them more. I think this is exactly what I need, and so I go into the New Year, for the first time in my life, with a sense of hope. Above all else, I hope for some clarity, to de-clutter the thoughts in my head. Who knows what this de-cluttering will mean, but at the end of the day, it'll be decisions I've made while having the time to reflect on them within myself, with no outside influences.

The more I think about it, the more excited I get. I think of the little things, like setting up my new place, buying new furniture, going for walks around a new neighbourhood. No doubt I'll be lonely at nights, but I intend to set up an internet connection (even though it will only be a 56k, not the high speed i'm used to) so that I can talk to people. My clan duties will have to be restricted to playing on weekends though, so I'll miss that, but the nuts and bolts of it is I'm extremely excited.

So this weekend I'm going camping at Burra - the place where I got really sick last time. So this trip has to be an improvement on the last. This time we're staying in caravans so it won't really be camping at all, rather a civilised holiday. And I'm going prepared with eyedrops, nasal spray and, well, an entire drugstore almost, to ward off the evil spirits that live in Burra. This time I'm leaving on Friday afternoon, leaving work a little earlier.

Anyway, best get going. Not that I have anything else to do, so I will resume sitting here staring blankly at the screen.